Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 37 and the Aftermath

So much has happened since I completed my cleanse and stepped back into the world of regular life. It kinda makes me wanna jump back into the safe womb of cleansing!

Funny, many people have expressed their admiration for undertaking a 37-day cleanse. Now that I have been back in the eating world with the bulk of the population, I have to say that cleansing is by far easier! Finding the balance of being in the world, while keeping your boundaries and taking good care of yourself is so more challenging.

I had an epiphany that the missing link, ironically, was animal protein. The sleeplessness, the difficulty keeping myself grounded and calm, the bruising that would take forever to heal [in addition to being Type O blood (the meat eaters blood type)], Pitta-Vata (Ayurveda), having half a dozen people tell me that I should be eating meat and the fact that I work out like an “animal”, all lead me to the conclusion that it was time to add some meat into my diet. It’s been a difficult adjustment. In my mind, I still see myself as a vegetarian. My body may physically be showing the signs of wanting meat, but emotionally, I don’t crave it at all.

But I went for it. I started reading up on the Paleo Diet and it makes a lot of sense —eating like a cave woman, primal, instinctual and simple. Lots of veggies, fruits, healthy fats and meats, in that order. I started easing my way into this new lifestyle. I went to the farmers market and stocked up on all the fresh veggie sprouts and bought some organic, naturally raised and humanely slaughtered (wow, that’s still a tough one to wrap my mind and tongue around) animals and went home and started cooking more. It was great to eat some hot meals. Lots of sautéed greens, some fresh eggs. And then I got my period. I cooked up 6 oz. of ground beef and ate it mixed up with my greens, just about 2 oz. worth at a time. I did that for 3 days in a row during the first 3 days of my menstrual cycle, fortifying myself and my anemia with some high-quality, home-cooked red meat. Just a little at a time. And I felt great! Until the 3rd day.

Then the pain started in my gut and throughout my entire body. It felt like food poisoning. I wanted to puke; I wanted to s_ _ t my brains out! But I didn’t and the poisoning just circulated through my system, giving me the most intense body aches all over. Even my hair hurt! And the gas in my belly! OMG. My stomach was so hard and distended. I would double over in pain that literally brought me to my knees. I was sick like that for four days straight. It took another week to slowly start feeling better, stronger and to slowly start having normal bowel movements and release the trapped gases. But the next week I got sick, a head cold, a cough, a sore throat. I guess my immune system became weakened. I threw my neck out and I had to stop working out for days at a time. I literally felt like my body was breaking down! WTF?? I just spent 37 days feeling like a super human and now I can’t digest anything, I can’t work out, I’m gimpy, my belly hurts my body hurts…JEEZ!!

I had a Biofeedback session and discovered all these organ systems under stress and the realization smacked me in the face hard! When you cleanse, when you detox, you are not ending a cycle, you are beginning one. You are beginning an opportunity for greater and deeper cleansing and healing. But the work isn’t finishing, it’s really just beginning.

I miss my cleanse. Plain and simple. I realize I have more work to do and am working with bioenergetics to understand where exactly my work is, both physically and emotionally. I met with Gabe today and told him I wanted to start another cleanse. He impressed upon me that I was running for safety in something that is familiar; I am already on a different kind of cleanse, a restorative cleanse that’s going to require dedication and faith. And some change of habits.

Breaking patterns is probably the toughest work there is. Some of you might think I am crazy for being on a 37-day cleanse. Or it might seem unbelievable that I am way more comfortable jumping from one cleanse to another, rather than facing a new me, with new needs and new lifestyle choices. Whether it be food or sleep aids or men or whatever else challenges you, breaking the patterns that aren’t working is where the real work is. And so I’m gonna take it even slower, but I’m going to stick with giving this new lifestyle a real chance.

I am really lucky. I have an amazing team of support and wisdom around me. I have a fully-stocked tool belt and friends and family behind me. I am making different choices and learning to discern what works for me and what I need to let go of. I haven’t figured it all out yet. Like how exactly do you let go of something when your heart still desperately wants to hold on? But, at least I have the AWARENESS to let go. And I have my beloved spinning, pole dancing and yoga to help me through when all else fails.

And the best news is, I am sleeping better than I have in ages! I am still taking melatonin drops, but that’s it. I’m off all other sleep aids and all pharmaceuticals. I’m waking up only once or twice max to pee and then going right back to sleep again and staying asleep until 5 or 6am. I am actually getting a solid 6-8 hours a night, which is miraculous from where I started.

Life is a journey. It certainly doesn’t end here. Actually, from what I understand, it’s just beginning.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 36

Another great day! Spin class with my friend Scottie early this morning and then met up with a new friend at the Union Square Farmers Market. She showed me all of her favorite stands to buy certain foods. We got fermented foods, kale, sweet radishes, grass fed chicken and beef, heirloom eggs, amazing fresh sprouts. We spent a couple of hours walking thru the market and I have to say I haven’t done that for years. It was exciting to stock up for some good cooking after so many days of not having hot foods.

I’ve been researching the Paleo Diet. After almost 30 years of being a vegetarian, I am now, after this cleanse, strongly feeling that I will begin eating some meat again. This is huge for me. I have identified myself as a vegetarian for nearly three decades. During both my pregnancies I never once craved meat, but I did eat some small amounts of it for extra insurance that my babies’ brains would have the proteins they required to develop fully and healthfully, even though I’m sure they would have been just fine without it. It was a chance I chose not to risk as they each would only have one opportunity for a healthy brain. And I remember I saw it as a sacrifice that I made for them. It wasn’t easy making that decision. And somehow now, making this decision to go back to eating some meat seems easier and more appropriate.

It makes sense to me too. Since taking the iron pills regularly, the bruising I get on my legs from my active lifestyle (bumping into things, falling off my bike and banging against the pole in dance class) have been healing much faster. My sleep is getting better, but still not nearly where I would like to see it at. I work out so much and so hard. I feel my period is coming on now and I can’t help but wonder how things would be different if I had some very grounding animal protein in my diet, and specifically some red meat during my menstruation.

If I go this route, I will only ingest high-quality, grass-fed and humanely treated animals. During my pregnancies, I did eat some meat and something interesting occurred. I was fine when I ate organic meats. But since I was trying things that I hadn’t had in about 20 years, I decided to try a little bit of everything. I remember eating spare ribs again from a Chinese restaurant and the flood of memories that came back…that safe feeling of being with my family on a Sunday night at Hunan, the local Chinese hub. Eating spare ribs and lo mien and feeling safe and comforted before the week would open up and take me in, starting in just another twelve hours as Monday morning approached. And these were early memories, from before I was thirteen years old, the age that I became a vegetarian. And when I tried those spare ribs again at 35, that night when I went to sleep, I had terrible nightmares. Bloody dreams of death and maimings. And that would happen most nights when I would eat meat. Meat that was not organic and where the animals were most likely treated in a way that we could not begin to want to imagine.

So this is where this cleanse has brought me. I never would have guessed it and I never would have known. It was not within my list of expectations, but there it is. And I am here, going with the flow, staying open to listening to the messages that the universe or god has for me…just as I did when I was thirteen. Perhaps I’ve changed? Perhaps my needs have changed? Funny how hard we try to hang on to who we were or thought we were supposed to be and how hard it can be to just let go and be who we are. I am open…I am free.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 35

A MUCH better day today! A lot of exercise definitely helped shake off the blues. Spin, yoga and dance class today back to back. I am back in action!

My kids really enjoy coming with me to SanaVita.

When Dr. Romy visits SanaVita each year, my kids meet with him for a spiritual healing. Dr. Romy does healings and spiritual surgeries. He always takes time to work with my children, rubbing coconut oil into their skin to help calm their spirits and offers us home remedies to help improve our general health.

Dr. Romy will be visiting SanaVita again this coming weekend. Please feel free to call with any inquiries.

Today, I took my kids to SanaVita to have a biofeedback session with Gabriel. When I told them they were going to be seeing Gabe at SanaVita they were very excited! They have gotten to know him well and really enjoy being with him.

Arul's 37-Day Cleanse: Gabe and Seven
Gabe and Seven
Arul's 37-Day Cleanse: Gabe and Naturale
Gabe and Naturale
Gabe spent about a half hour with each child, testing them for different homeopathic remedies and offering some dietary recommendations. First, my son, Seven sat with Gabe and we discussed his constant congestion in his upper respiratory area. Then my daughter, Naturale sat with him and we continued to discuss her ongoing issue with dry skin and her high vatic energy. Both kids had fun telling stories and being the center of attention, while still being aware that something “medical” was happening. And it made them feel like they were participating in and partly responsible for their health. They are both very interested in being healthy, even though they still love their special treats.

We are on day 3 of their new supplemental regime. Mama is still figuring out the best way to get the “medicines” into them each morning and evening, as they are not crazy about some of the tastes. We have added “taking medicines” onto their daily responsibility charts and they are now receiving a sticker for each time they take them. Whatever helps…sign us up!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 34

Today I had my first salad! It was delicious! I definitely have been feeling the effects of the wine from last night and have been feeling a little down. And PMS is prevalent…frustration, slight irritability, general malaise. But it’s ok. I know it’s just a temporary feeling. And that’s the biggest difference I am noticing in myself these days. I’ve always been so highly reactive; whatever I feel, I always feel so strongly. In the moment, I feel like it’s how I will feel forever. But now, I am calmer. Less reactive. And when I’m not feeling great I know it won’t last forever. I feel as though someone who started taking anti-depressants might feel a month after being on the meds as they start to kick in and feel differently. More optimistic, balanced, reassured. But without the numbness.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 33

Well we had about 30 people in and out of our house last night. It was so nice to have close friends and family in our home for the traditional holiday. I meant to take a picture of the spread, but it all happened so fast! I do have 2 recipes I’d like to share with you, however.

In addition to the traditional Jewish bagels and smoked fish delicacies, I prepared a Quinoa salad and Tzatziki yogurt dill dip. They were both big hits!

Tzatziki
2 cups plain Greek yogurt (I recommend whole fat yogurt)
½ cup sour cream (optional)
2 cucumbers peeled, halved lengthwise, seeded and grated
2 tablespoons of lemon juice
1 garlic clove, minced
2 tablespoons minced fresh dill
½ tablespoon of course sea salt

Mix all the ingredients and enjoy with crudités or gluten free pretzels, chips or crackers or just off the spoon!

Quinoa Salad
Cook about a cup and a half of quinoa, I like to throw a vegetable bouillon cube in while cooking.
Separately sauté Vidalia onion, red, yellow and orange bell pepper and a can of organic black beans in coconut oil.
When they are both finished cooking, mix and let cool.
When totally cool, add a couple of tablespoons of fresh minced dill, 2 peeled and chopped cucumbers and fresh lemon and lime juice.
Add salt to taste.

I tried both of the dishes I made and continued drinking juice throughout the evening. I also indulged in some wine since I’m wrapping up my cleanse and it was SUCH a festive occasion. I definitely felt sluggish today from the wine. Even though it wasn’t that much, I still felt the effects. And I am glad as it reminds me how good I feel without it!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Days 31 & 32

The last two days have been pretty uneventful. I’ve been catching up on a lot of desk work so I’ve been at the computer working from home. I have taken the last two days off from exercise, as my body is truly exhausted. My sleep hasn’t been too good since Saturday night and feeling just kinda heavy and a little down.

Now that I know I am expecting my period in a few days it all makes sense and I am being gentle with myself. Life is not about being “perfect” every moment, every day. Another lesson I’ve always known but feel like I have finally gotten through this cleanse. If I don’t meet my very high standards for myself each and every day it doesn’t change me or make me a “bad girl” one day and a “good girl” another. It is an ebb and flow and it’s imperative to ride that cycle, WITHOUT getting on the roller coaster! The seasons change, as they are right now, and as a woman we go through our cycle each month. My cycle is aligned with the Equinox this month, along with Yom Kippur, which has always been a deeply felt holiday for me.

After temple today we will be having break fast at our house, about 30 people or so. Yesterday I did all the shopping. Got all the bagels, whitefish, salmon, etc. I have to say, being at Ess-a-Bagel smelling all the hot everything bagels definitely made we hungry for traditional Jewish comfort food! I did try the whitefish but was able to stay away from the bagels! After this cleanse, my goal is to give up gluten entirely and possibly dairy as well, although I don’t have much of it as it is and mostly keep to sheep and goat products. I’d like to try eliminating dairy, as coconut is a much better and more readily available substitute than ever before. Ultimately, I plan on doing some Zyto testing to see which particular foods I am most suited for. We are developing Zyto testing at SanaVita and hope to provide this service to our clients in the next few months.

In observation of the holiday, I’m back on just juice for the day. Wishing all those marking the holiday, a happy and easy fast.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 30

The next day I hit Danny’s Soul Survivor spin class and I hit it hard. Just before I went into my hour of worship, Arulian style, I texted Frenchie and told him that I was sorry but would not be able to meet with him as planned. I tried to explain that I felt uncomfortable and was not ready to just start having a sexual relationship with someone I didn’t even know. Yes, I know we were just kissing but we all know where that leads to and I’m just not up for it. And I felt really good about my choice. It would almost be easier to just ignore my mind and just go with what feels good. But I’ve been doing that most of my life and although it has brought me to a pretty magnificent place in the world, I haven’t been so lucky in my romantic life. And so I said “no thank you” to the drug and sweated my ass off in spin class instead.

After class I had a couple of texts from Frenchie and after a little back and forth agreed to meet for tea/coffee in an outdoor café. Although I was feeling slightly guarded, we did have a really nice rapport and I did end up letting my guard down and relaxing into it.

Of course, he still wanted to come over. I said goodbye and went home. And I ate. I ate a jar of trail mix. Avocados. Papayas. Almond butter and honey in a bowl. Anything and everything I could make a case for that was somewhat reasonable.

Later in the evening I touched base with my girlfriend who was PMSing. She finally got her period. I thought about the weekend and decided to count the days. It’s official. I am PMSing.

So, what does it all mean? I am validated. It all makes sense. But there’s more than just that. Something is really shifting in me. I am starting to see the patterns. And I am beginning to be accountable for my choices rather than just mindlessly fall into the traps of my momentary desires. I can see that I am uncomfortable in a situation and acknowledge why and make a choice from that place. And put myself and my well being first. And so I got triggered and I ate too much. But I didn’t drink. Or take a sleeping pill. Or have passionate casual sex with someone to take my mind off of a sadness in my heart. There was still the need to fill the void with something…trail mix! But it wasn’t immediate and it wasn’t a day’s worth and it wasn’t as harmful as another choice could have been.

This cleanse, although not perfect, has been perfectly perfect for me. I am learning a lot about myself. My coping mechanisms and how to adjust with surrendering, rather than self-beating. It’s like the day I got hit on my bike and went down. I saw it happening as everything slowed down and I had time to make a choice. And I choose to let it go. It was in that letting go that I saved myself from further injury.

I have one week left on this cleanse. Seven more glorious days. In these last seven days I will start to allow myself to transition back into a greater variety of foods while still drinking juices and smoothies. I will stick to raw and keep my portions smaller and more frequent. Although Wednesday, for Yom Kippur, I will fast on just juice and water.

And I will stay aware.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 29

Well the weekend was definitely challenging on the cleansing and emotional fronts, which have become very intertwined.

Coincidentally, a friend of mine has also been on a cleanse and hasn’t been drinking at all. She has three kids and a dog. I have been incredibly impressed! For the last couple of days she’s been telling me that she wants to have a drink and that she is getting her period. We’ve seen the pattern for years now. Every month just before our period strikes, we start to feel, well…rambunctious. Desirous. Somehow insatiable. It took us a while to do the math, never paying close enough attention to our cycles but then we saw it. The day after a ridiculous hangover there it would be. The stain on the panties indicating that menstruation had just begun. And the bell would ding, “Ohhhh. So that’s why I went out and partied like a college student the night before last.”

Studies show that hormones have a direct effect on cravings and behavioral patterns. During the luteal phase of the menstrual cycle (the latter 2 weeks aka PMS) the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal response increases, which increases sensitivities to stress. Meanwhile, progesterone makes the brain more reactive to emotions and stressors. The poor gal looks to her self-soothing techniques to help her cope. Losing yourself in food, alcohol, sex and yes, rock and roll, are all pretty sure-fire ways to find comfort.

My girlfriend kept saying she was getting her period. And asked me if I was, which I said no, because, well, I didn’t think I could already be there. And I put it aside and went about my weekend.

We went to Governors Island on Saturday. After an early 2½-hour exercise extravaganza (30-minute bike ride, 30-minute walk, 30-minute spin, 30-minute walk, 30-minute bike ride), I pounded my smoothie, packed some fruit and an avocado for later and hit the ferry with the kids and our friends. After we finally got there and got settled, it was time for lunch. I didn’t have that much with me and as the day went on, I became ravenous. By the time we got home (a little after 3pm) I was starved and hit the trail mix hard. Even though it was all sprouted it was just too much and my hunger continued.

Then we went to a birthday party aka pizza and cake. I ate olives and pounded water. After the party, I went on a date in the East Village. Someone new. A French guy with a kid and some similar life experiences. It was really fun and nice and felt great to be out on a Saturday night in the village feeling some chemistry. By the end of the evening — I was home before midnight! Funny what becomes the end of a Saturday night when you are 40 plus and a full-time mama! — there was even some kissing action, which was super fun. So we made a plan to see each other the next day.

But then something weird happened. I got totally bugged out. I won’t go into all the details, but all I knew for sure was that I didn’t know this guy. But I was feeling chemistry and having fun. And enjoying kissing. After my last two experiences with guys whom I felt chemistry with and had fun with and enjoyed kissing with…well, all of a sudden I felt nervous and uncomfortable. I think it could be called vulnerability. And I didn’t like it, not one bit.

I was in bad shape after my breakup with my ex beau. Really bad shape. And the last guy I was seeing (my friend and I call him “Tokyo”), well I’m still dealing with the repercussions of our last encounter when he declared he was not ready for anything serious. Since I had already started to develop feelings, I kinda told him I wouldn’t be able to continue seeing him. Then he went away for a couple of weeks. I’ve been aware that he should be returning home soon. Wondering how it will play out when he contacts me. Reminding myself that I will have to be the strong one and just say no to a drug that will send me sky high and then catapult me back down at lightning speed.

Tokyo was a distraction from my broken heart over my ex. Was this guy now going to be the distraction from Tokyo? And how much longer would I have to ride the train wreck of a roller coaster anyhow? Boy! Did I ever wanna start pounding shots now and stop my monkey mind from another word of chatter. And especially from any chatter that made any kind of sense!

So I did what any girl would do. I bolted. Poor Frenchie didn’t know what had happened. I ran past the palm trees, the waterfall and outta that atrium glass-topped palace, straight into the first taxi I saw. He asked if I was all right and if we were still on for tomorrow. I nodded yes, even though I knew the answer was “Not a chance in hell that I am ok and no, I will not be seeing you again, ever!” I went home, checked on my babies, paid the babysitter, locked the door and got ready for bed. When I looked at my phone there was a text from him again asking if I was all right. I told him I was fine and safely back at home. I figured I’d deal with the rest of it tomorrow.

Just before getting into bed I looked at my phone one last time. There was another text. This time it was from Tokyo. He was reaching out, letting me know he was thinking of me, all the way from the Philippines. I put the phone down and climbed into bed. I tossed and turned most of the night.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 28

Today was a real busy one! Kids, dance, work, pole class, work, and then 2 dates and back home in time to put babes to bed! A day in the life of a modern woman here in the big city!

A great day! Accomplished a lot. Feeling good! Fortunately, I DID wind up getting a good night’s sleep last night and I am sure that had a LOT to do with it.

But now I am exhausted at the end of a very busy day. My dates were lovely. Still no off-the-charts-through-the-roof chemical connections, but at least I am in the realm of discovering what I am truly looking for in a partner, someone who will be able to meet my needs and fit into all three of our lives.

Tomorrow, the babes and I have a big day planned. We are going to Governors Island for the bulk of the day and then have a birthday dinner at night. I am starting to feel antsy about my cleanse as the end approaches…Hoping to keep things stable through the weekend.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

 

 

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 27

Had a really tough night’s sleep last night for some reason. I don’t know if I was just totally wired from the whole day’s events, but I do know that by 3am I was still awake and organizing my undergarment drawer. You know you have insomnia when you are doing that!

Overall though, my sleep has been much better. And I am incredibly optimistic that tonight will be a night for sleep! I’ve been at the computer for almost the entire day. I haven’t exercised and my eyes are burning like crazy! I had a date tonight and took an hour and a half break to meet up with this guy I’ve seen a couple of times, but after I came back from the bathroom, he suggested we bolt…that I was obviously tired and he had work to do. Funny how I was concerned about going out this evening as I was out at the seminar last night and missed putting my kids to bed and didn’t want to miss it again for a second night in a row, but also didn’t want to cancel plans. Now I am home with the babes and wrapping things up. I really wanted a glass of wine tonight too. When I said goodnight and thank you to my date, his reply was, “No problem, anytime you want a glass of water with no ice give me a call.” Pretty funny.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 25

This morning, we were on our way to starting our second day of Rosh Hashanah special treats so we would go to temple with no complaints when my Dad called and suggested skipping temple since it was going to rain. And how ‘bout he just come over and play instead. I told him to hold on while I asked my kids how they felt about that. They jumped up and down and cheered as though they had just found out there was no school due to a snow blizzard. Then Seven stopped in his tracks and looked at me very seriously and asked, “but we can still have doughnuts, right mama?” I told him, “yes, next Wednesday when we go back to Temple for Yom Kippur!”

We had a nice time together and then I split to hit SanaVita, yoga and then back to SanaVita. Last night we had another family over for Rosh Hashanah dinner. The two boys who came over have very particular eating needs, so I cooked noodles in butter, salt and parmesan cheese (just as requested) as well as corn on the cob and kale.

My daughter exclaimed how pleased she was that I was making kale and that she loves it soooo much! This made me very happy, as it is truly one of my favorite things to eat. I prepare it by sautéing garlic in coconut oil. The coconut oil gives it an amazing flavor and is the only oil that won’t oxidize and become toxic under high heats. It is truly the only oil we should cook with when cooking with high heats.

Then I throw in the kale, add a little tamari sauce and a few drops of water. Then I cover it and let it sit for maybe 10 minutes on medium heat. It is sooooo delicious and for the first time in a while I was seriously craving to eat. I mean chow down! I definitely needed to pull out the willpower strings on that one last night.

But the rest of the evening was seamless. I LOVE entertaining and cooking and feeding people while I am cleansing. Having the relationship and intimacy with the food fills in the gaps and still finds a way to satiate me.

By the way, when push came to shove, Naturale changed her mind and said she didn’t really like the kale so much actually, but she ate it all from her plate anyway. Yay! I mean, once upon a time I didn’t like kale either. But now I fantasize about it!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 24

So today is Rosh Hashanah! My kids were less than thrilled to go to temple today even though we were meeting Grandpa there, we would be in one of the many houses of God AND it is the Jewish New Year. Their response was, “but it’s soooo boring! And we never even get to SEE God even though we are at his house!”

So I bribed them with a going-out-to-breakfast extravaganza. Since it is the New Year, we celebrated with 2 munchkins each, a bagel and pancakes. Yes, sugar and carbs is what it as all about, but it is a special occasion. And as we made our way down the block, stopping off at multiple locations for this morning’s special treat parade, I sipped on my green juice and felt happy and quite satisfied, not craving any of the stuff my kids were indulging in. I was truly happy to be spending the morning with them and knowing that although we are not religious, we would be keeping tradition and going to temple with my dear, loving Dad.

I left my kids with my Dad for a bit and came to SanaVita to do some work. Then I got in a quick yoga practice before temple. When I arrived, my Dad was already inside with the babes. And ohhhh how cute they looked! 7 was dressed in the outfit I had picked for him, sitting next to his big sister, dressed in the dress she chose herself.

Grandpa and my babes at temple
Grandpa and my babes at temple
It was a children’s service and incredibly heart-warming to see all the cute kiddies and proud parents milling about. The service at Brotherhood Synagogue was free and open to all. It was very kid friendly and the children actively participated in the service.

It was an amazing and surreal experience to be there as the grown-up with my two children, sitting beside my father. Now I was the mama and my babies were looking up at ME with pleading eyes. “Mama! How much longer mama?” over and over again. And then my son looks at me with a fierce expression and wide eyes and declares that he is STARVING! And thirsty too! “Seven-pie, didn’t you just eat lunch?”, I ask. He tells me yes, but he is starving again and needs to eat!

Luckily I had my super food / kale smoothie on hand. Even though they often crinkle their noses and decline my offerings of the weird stuff I drink, there in temple, in front of God, they drank from my cup of goodness. And drank and drank and drank…

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Days 22 & 23

My weekend with the kiddies started off with a big bang! On my way home from my date, which was quite lovely, I rode by our local haunt and picked up another mama and a couple of kiddies and brought them all back to our place for a late-night play date. My kids were psyched!

The morning was a little tough as we didn’t get to sleep till after midnight and the kids were all up a little after 6am, but spin class with Danny set me back on track. Our plan was to hit Coney Island for the day with some friends. Usually, being there with all the stimulation and the temptations of Nathan’s French Fries and cotton candy (I loooove cotton candy!) and the smell of hot salty popcorn, my cravings run strong. But being there was quite easy and I really didn’t feel tempted at all.

I had juice in the morning and made a super deluxe smoothie to bring with me, which held me over quite well until the end of the day, when we stopped by Nathan’s for dinner. I was hungry and didn’t have anything left with me so I ate some pickles that held me over till I got home. The day was great! My kids LOVE Coney Island so much and we often go in the summer.

Here’s one of my favorite pics of them from last summer.

Arul's 37-Day Cleanse: Days 22 & 23

Yesterday was a mellow day with the kids. Spin in the morning, then play dates and dinner with friends. My juices and smoothies held me over throughout the day. For dinner, we went to a restaurant where I was able to get some guacamole and I brought my flax seed crackers with me. It was lovely to sit and share a meal with my friend and our kids and still stay within my guidelines. I have to admit, I was still tempted by her glasses of wine. Even though I know red wine gives me a headache, I still wanted it. But I was glad I was safe inside my cleanse.

I slept pretty well last night. Close to 8 hours with less tossing and turning than usual. I’m still feeling emotionally raw and a bit up and down, but holding steady.

When I look back, I remember feeling rather solemn this time of year. The distinct memory of sitting in temple with my family and feeling sad is quite vivid. I am taking my kids to temple this afternoon with my Dad as we did last year and hoping to make it a tradition for us…and keep it light and happy. Yoga class beforehand should help with that for sure!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 21

Much better today!!

Last night I took my melatonin and shut the lights at 10:30pm. I slept straight through till 2am. Was up about an hour and fell back asleep till 5. Then got another hour on the back end. Not bad!

And today was a doozy of a day! Kids in the AM, then meeting, spin, errands, 2-hour pole class, meeting, work, meeting! I’ve been drinking my juices, had a kale smoothie and munched on some sprouted trail mix and some olives this afternoon. I’ll have one more green juice later this evening on my date!

Yup, goin’ on another date. Gotta pick yourself back up and shake it off and move forward when you fall off the horse. I am trying on some different guys for size now: Men who have children, who know what it’s like to be a parent. Men who have no choice but to face their responsibilities and be held accountable for themselves and their actions. The last two men I dated had a lot of similarities in the way they conducted themselves. Don’t get me wrong, they were both lovely men, kind souls, sweet and caring, but there was a level of emotional unavailability that I don’t care to repeat. My mother put it very well and made me chuckle when she said, “What is it with these two? Do you see the similarities? It’s like they went to the same school!” When she’s not driving me crazy, she’s cracking me up! I am sure she says the same about me!!

Yesterday my therapist said something to me — he knew he was pushing my limits, but there was utter truth to his statement. “Well Arul, you are your daughter’s mother and your mother’s daughter.” I am still processing that one, but I know it is true. I need to pave the path myself first, whack those weeds down to create greater visibility for the true path to be seen, unencumbered for my daughter. She may choose a different path, but I can at least show her the way by my example, not just by my words.

This makes me think of a moment we shared together last summer. She was here at SanaVita making a poo in the bathroom and she thoughtfully asked me, “Mama? Who’s in charge here?” I looked at her and smiled as I realized the answer myself, as it still surprises me. I said, “Mama is, baby.” She looked at me, stone-faced for a moment and then rolled her eyes exclaiming, “No, no, no, no, no, mama. You are not understanding my question! I mean who’s in charge, of like EVERYTHING. Of what happens and all the people!?!?” I nodded and continued to smile and said, “I know baby, and that’s all mama. I am in charge of everything here at SanaVita and of what happens and of all the people.”

Then she smiled, so genuinely pleased and said, “WOW!! That’s soooo cool!”

It was my shining moment. All the work, sacrifice, worry. All the times they cried and begged me not to go to work and please stay with them, as I tried to explain that it is SanaVita that provides us with the money that we need to buy the apple juice and the My Little Ponies and the beyblades. It was all for this moment. To see the “click” behind my darling girls’ eyes, the pride that exuded from them, the realization that her mama was something bigger than just her mama. A strong mama who takes care of her and lots of other people too. That was an amazing moment for me. And I journey onward to further teach them, my darling babies, by example, to be the best you that you can be.

I am gonna be just fine!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 20, PM

I’ve been facing the repercussions of the last few days as I have been struggling with a dull migraine all day and am sluggish and feeling short-fused. But even in the face of all that, I am handling things much better than I was months ago and my biofeedback session today reflected this information to me clearly on the computer screen. My ability to cope with a situation is strong and my reactionary behavior is calm. I was really happy to see the improvement in black and white (well actually it’s in vivid colors!) on the computer screen with little room for subjectivity.

Gabriel and I went over the course of events the last few days in great depth. It was very helpful in my processing to talk with him while he was downloading deeper information from my own central nervous system, gently guiding me with appropriate questions, helping me pinpoint how I was feeling and identify the patterned “tapes” that play in my head. And, most importantly, he showed me how to healthfully and honestly move forward. It was raw. It wasn’t easy or necessarily pleasant, but by the end of the session, my head finally stopped throbbing for the first time today and I did feel more clear and optimistic.

Gabe also re-tested my homeopathic and added 3 more drops to my regimen. I am going to start taking them this evening.

And I think I am gonna be just fine.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 20, AM

I was still pretty raw by the time I got home yesterday — earlier than usual — to spend the entire evening with my kids. I’ve been working late and only make it home for dinner every other night or so and often we have play dates or see Grandpa for dinner. So last night, it was just the 3 of us. And it was lovely. I made them dinner, we ate and listened to music, played Super Mario brothers and board games, read a book and snuggled in bed.

But the need for grounding and comfort was strong. And I was ravenous. I was definitely hungry for food as I had exercised like an animal all day on very little sleep, but I was also hungry to fill the sadness that I had been dealing with. So I ate more than I have eaten in nearly 20 days. I kept it within the parameters of what I have been eating — seaweed, avocado, sprouted nuts, coconut butter, etc. — and it wasn’t a ridiculous amount, but more than what my stomach and system are used to at this point. I felt heavy by the time I wrapped it up. And before I ended the evening I ate some raw dark chocolate. I knew I was asking for trouble because of my sleep issues. I was already in the red zone after only getting 4 hours of sleep the night before, so I made an executive decision and took a Xanax at 8:30 after the kids were sleeping. I crawled into bed and was sleeping within 30 minutes.

And I finally did get a good night’s sleep. Nine hours, basically straight. And although I am feeling a little extra heavy this morning, I am ready to climb back up on my horse and continue on. I had a little setback, and I share this with you because it is important to know. Life is unpredictable and challenging and will throw us curve balls. Had I been fasting on just juice and had the same setback, the repercussions would have been harder to overcome. The digestive system would have been completely shut down and that could be seriously problematic.

The biggest issue here is my ego and my desire to beat myself up over it and then self-sabotage and combust, totally falling off the wagon. The power and opportunity here is to accept where I am at, how I have handled things, which in my opinion is pretty stellar (all things considered), stand up, wipe myself off and keep going.

I just finished preparing my kale/avocado super smoothie for later today and am sipping on my fresh watermelon juice now. I’ll have a colonic today and my second session with Gabriel Hoffman in Biofeedback. I’m really looking forward to further processing my experience and checking up on my status to see where I’m at with my homeopathic regime.

I’ll fill you in later!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 19

Yesterday, after a truly magnificent day of work, exercise and mommy stuff, I got thrown off my game and into an old habit that proved to be useless.

I was on my way to meet up with a guy I’ve been casually seeing for several months. He’s actually the first guy I’ve met since my breakup that has held my interest and we are at the point where two people need to acknowledge where they’re at and if they see their relationship moving forward or not. I instinctively knew that last night was the night this conversation was going to happen and was both excited and nervous because once it’s out there, there’s really no turning back. It’s either going to move forward into an attempt at greater intimacy and exclusivity or the cord really would need to be cut.

After nearly two years of loving someone and then having to say goodbye and let go, I promised myself that I wouldn’t allow that to happen again. Although I do like this guy, enjoy his company and would like to get to know him better, I know that he is not in a place in his life to really be in a relationship the way I require. And, after this conversation takes place, we will most likely need to stop seeing each other. So I was nervous, excited at the prospect of having clarity, but nervous to have to say goodbye.

On my way to meet him, I stopped at my local corner spot to say hi to my crew of friends. There was a woman there whom I’ve known for years who I’ve been casually friendly with, even though she has a reputation of being a catty mean-spirited individual. She had always been nice enough to me so I would engage with her when I saw her. Well, last night she unleashed her dark side on me when I sat down and started calling me names and saying mean things to me. I was thrown back to high school in the blink of an eye. I quickly picked up my bag and walked away without saying a word.

After this bizarre and disturbing berating, I got on my bike and headed downtown to meet up with the guy. We decided to meet for a drink, but a faux cosmo was not what I wanted or needed. I ordered a high-end scotch on the rocks and gently sipped it while pounding water. By the end of our talk, I had consumed about ¼ of what was in my glass. Our talk was sincere and honest and although we like each other a lot, there really is no hope for a future for us. Although we left things open as far as continuing to see each other, it will probably be the last time we ever spend time together — casual intimacies with a friend with no future is like drugs or scotch: it feels good in the moment, but there is no long-term good that can come from it. And I am looking for someone who fits into my life, all aspects of it, not just one aspect.

So I rode my bicycle home, got upstairs, checked on my kids and went into my room. And the monkey mind began a chorus of chastising and hopeless sad stories that screamed in my head all at once and I could feel the tears welling up behind my eyes. NO. I will not start crying again! I cried for months after my breakup and although I was sad about the guy from tonight, the deep river of tears I was fighting back went much deeper than him. And all the residual feelings I’ve been carrying but not giving credence to over my breakup started to surface. It was 10pm and there were many hours to face in the dark with my thoughts and my heart. So I reached for it. A sleep aid. A magic pill to shut my mind down and pass me out.

I slept about four hours. And then I was up and exhausted and my mind was still there. And in the morning I was still exhausted and my mind was still active, but it was time to make the babies breakfast, lunches and snacks.

So I moved through my day, avoiding the sadness, refusing to acknowledge the vulnerability. Moving forward, pushing on as I always do.

I made it to spin, I made it to work, I made it to S Factor for my pole dance class. And I was fine. Not great today, but fine. As I have to be. And then the second song of this two-hour class began. Sinead O’ Connor’s voice filled the room. And as she sang out, “It’s been seven hours and fifteen days, since you took your love away” I started to weep. And I wept and moved and wept and kept my body moving through the poses while it quivered and shuttered and convulsed as the tears and snot all poured down. And then to my left I heard another woman’s release as she wept. And together we cried and let go of our pain as we moved through the first hour of our class.

Arul's 7 Day Cleanse: Day 19 -- Snake Part 1
Snake, Part 1
Arul's 7 Day Cleanse: Day 19 -- Snake Part 1
Snake, Part 2
Arul's 7 Day Cleanse: Day 19 -- Snake Part 3
Snake, Part 3

By the beginning of the second hour I felt like a completely different being. Today was pole week in class — no dancing, one straight hour of non-stop pole tricks. An hour earlier I had felt exhausted, dejected and concave. I now felt strong, open and expansive. I did tricks on the pole today that I have had trouble with in the past with great ease. I side-climbed to the top of the pole like I was a monkey on a tree and snaked down with no hands like it was nothing. By the end of class, my body was trembling and was exhausted, but I was exhilarated.

So I had a rough night last night. I tried medicating myself in ways that I have in the past and was unsuccessful at getting the relief that I needed. In the end I was forced to face some more of my feelings that were painful, and move through it in order to get the release I needed. I am grateful for this experience. The show must go on, as must the cleanse. As Kelly Clarkson says, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 18

I made another kale smoothie today and had a BM from heaven several hours later! I am flying high!

Today’s smoothie was chock full of chia seeds, protein powder (Raw Sun Warrior made from peas, cranberries, hemp and Stevia sweetened…it’s the best!) ground flax, senna and cactus leaf and then the rest of the usual supplements. I have been super charged riding my bike back and forth all day going from meeting to meeting. Managed to squeeze in a quick yoga practice as well and shot some hoops with my work associate, Gabriel Hoffman. In addition to being my biofeedback practitioner and holistic pharmacist, he also serves as a wonderful B-Ball coach teaching me how to dunk the ball with a proper one-handed shot. I have to say, I did pretty darn well!

After B-Ball I needed something more so I munched on some soaked seeds and nuts and rehydrated with some raw coconut water. I received my second lymphatic drainage therapy session this afternoon as I am aiming to do at least once a week moving forward. The congestion that I had has already improved dramatically! I am now finishing up my BPC green juice and will finish this morning’s kale smoothie at the end of the day.

If I can keep these amazzzzzing bowel movements up now that my period is over and I have gotten rid of so much old matter, I will really be in seventh heaven! J I think I will keep up with this smoothie for the next few days and see what happens. Did you know that one cup of kale contains nearly 20% of the RDA of dietary fiber, which promotes regular digestion, prevents constipation, lowers blood sugar and curbs overeating? It also fights the formation of H. Pylori, a bacterial growth in the stomach lining that can lead to gastric cancer. Finally, it is FULL of ANTIOXIDANTS and very high in vitamins K, A and C.

Tomorrow I will substitute the banana with avocado. Avocados actually have 60% MORE POTASSIUM than bananas and for all of us trying to keep our glycemic indexes down but still need that potassium boost, avocados are the way to go! They are an excellent choice in a smoothie to use as a thickener, spiking the blood sugar or messing with rules of food combining.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 17

Today has been a winning day, but it’s no wonder as it’s my 17th day…and you know how we love the number 7!!

I started my day with making two breakfasts, two lunches and two snacks for my babes in 30 minutes. First time I ever had to do that as it was the longest day my son would in school. The transition time into kindergarten is now ending. It was definitely a lot to do in the morning, but I’m getting my systems down pat!

I made sure to fortify myself with some fresh squeezed OJ and all my supplements before bringing my kids to school and heading over to Soul Cycle for spin class on Thumbalina (my bike of 13 years!). After spin, I came to SanaVita for a little work time and a colonic. It was my first colonic in days and it was amazing! Even after having a solid good BM this morning on my own, it was incredible how much old, dark, rock hard poo came out of me. This cleanse is really doing the trick and because I am allowing myself limited amounts of solids in my smoothies and the avocados, flax crackers and occasional nuts and/ or seeds, I am never hungry or feeling deprived. I wish I had gotten a picture for you to see it, but it all was happening too fast and intensely this morning to snap a shot!

After downing a delicious green BluePrintCleanse juice I headed over to my favorite yoga class at Oval Fitness. The gym is part of Stuyvesant Town and has a bunch of different classes, but the Monday class at 12:30pm has become my favorite in the city! Justin Ritchie is the instructor (he also teaches at Laughing Lotus) and his class kicks my butt every time! I’ve been practicing yoga for many years and he has the right blend of cardio, flow, holding poses and encouraging us to deepen them. And his instruction is clear and precise. I must say he seems to be one of the last teachers that I am exposed to that really gets in there with the adjustments! I just love him and his music too!

I had to go to a lunch meeting right after yoga but had just enough time to go upstairs and make myself a super smoothie as I was starving after my mornings events! Although I don’t normally encourage mixing fruits with veggies and protein, I did it today as I feel I am in the right place to be able to handle digesting the mix. I used coconut water as my base and added banana, strawberries, verge protein powder, spinach and a whole bunch of kale with the usual supplements and it was seriously delicious and nutritious! The perfect meal replacement to sip on while I lunched with 3 old friends, caught up on all the amazing things we are all doing with our lives and no one batted an eyelash. After all, I know these cats since grade school.. “Arul’s on a cleanse? No new news here!”

Turns out we were sitting right next to Chloe Sevigne! I always adored and related to her and take it as a little pat on the back from the universe that I’m in alignment. If you haven’t seen “Last Days of Disco” it’s where my connection to her really solidified. Jeez, how I love disco!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

 

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Days 15 & 16

So the weekend with the babes was incredibly active filled with a lot of socializing! We had a picnic in Battery Park planned with a friend and her son for Saturday but when the rain started to come down, we decided to make it a regular play date at our house instead. I decided to invite another friend with her daughter over so my daughter, Naturale, wouldn’t feel outnumbered by the boys. Over lunch with my kiddies where I was enjoying a fresh squeezed OJ I was explaining the change of plans to them and my daughter looks at me and says, “Mama! Why don’t we just make it a party?!?! Start texting EVERYBODY!” And I said, “Why not?”

Arul's 37-Day Cleanse: Day 15

We wound up with about 12 kids and 10 adults at our house starting at 2pm. I squeezed a large watermelon to make fresh juice and we made fresh watermelon margaritas and went through a case of Prosecco! I cooked angel hair pasta and chicken with sautéed broccoli and carrots, roasted butternut squash and Tzatziki! I had such a good time watching everyone milling about having fun, eating, drinking, dancing, the kids racing around screaming and playing!

After the first batch of margaritas were made, I had to taste it fresh out of the blender with the watermelon juice in there. But after tasting it, I was satisfied that it wasn’t what I wanted. The rest of the day and night was a breeze, between my delish juice (I made cantaloupe juice too…really sweet but a nice treat) and having my avocados to lean on, I was totally satiated by the love and communion in my home. The party ended a little bit after 1am! I was totally exhausted the next day but it was well worth it! And a blessing from the gods, or myself actually, that I didn’t have to deal with a hangover!! This cleansing thing rocks!!

The next day was definitely a bit of struggle, but I got a second wind in the afternoon. Silvia, one of my closest mommy friends, and I took our 4 kids to this great outdoor house music party called Mr. Sunday. It is in the backyard of a huge house in Carroll Gardens on the Gowaus Canal. The music was slammin’, they had a dance floor with a disco ball hanging from the trees above, a bar, a Mexican food stand, picnic tables and a little sandbox/Bocce Ball court.

Arul's 37-Day Cleanse: Day 16

We brought bats, balls and a jump rope with us and all the kids made friends with the other cool kids whose hip parents took them to this hoppin’ Sunday afternoon par-TAY! While the mamas got their grooves on the kiddies organized a little limbo action to the groovy grooves… another smash hit of a day blending the gap between kiddies and grownups…all while keeping it clean!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 14

So two weeks nearly under the belt. I’m still riding the wave…some days I am feeling fabulously strong, svelte and energized! Other days I am lethargic, headachy, body achy or setting my pants on fire! But overall I am happier, stronger and more even-keeled.

Today was a big day — spin and 2-hour pole dance class, in between kids, SanaVita and riding my bike back and forth through the city. I’m tired today but it’s really no wonder.

And I have a headache. I get migraines. They’ve been pretty tame through this cleanse fortunately but today I am struggling. I haven’t given myself a colonic today and although I did have a small BM earlier this morning that may be what’s ailing me. I’ll be with my kids all weekend and won’t have time for any self-care services such as colonics so I will try and get one in before I leave today.

I am really excited to spend the weekend with my kids. We haven’t had a weekend together in such a long time, since before they went away for three weeks with their Dad. Cleansing with them can sometimes be challenging. however. It’s hard to always plan ahead to have something with me when I’m crashing that’s suitable. And hanging with other parents with their kids usually ends with meals that include a glass of wine…or two or three! So I just need to be aware and try my best to be prepared.

As far as my sleep goes, I have to say last night was pretty remarkable. By 10:30pm my eyes were literally burning they were so tired, I hit the lights and passed out almost immediately. I haven’t done that without some type of aid in, well, perhaps years. My “monkey mind” as my dear friend Scottie likes to refer to it — the tapes that play over and over, the endless conversations of what could have been, what I should have done, what I will do and how much my heart still hurts over the loss of love I felt in my last relationship — was quiet. I mean seriously quiet. Usually when I lay in bed, my monkey mind keeps me awake. When I finally fall asleep if I wake up to pee or even just to roll over, my mind becomes active immediately and I can be awake again for hours.

Last night I woke up to pee at 2:30AM (4 straight hours!). My plan was to keep my eyes closed and do it fast and try to get right back to sleep. But I am on my period and, well, had some attending to that needed to be dealt with. Lights had to be turned on, things needed to be washed… if you are a woman, you know exactly what I am talking about. The middle of the night fiasco lasted about a half an hour and as I was crawling back into the bed I remember thinking, “jeez, I wonder how long this is gonna take now!” It’s the last thing I remember. I passed right out, waking up one more time in the 5am range and again went right back to sleep. Next thing I knew it was 7:15am and I had 45 minutes to get myself ready, make the kids breakfast, make their lunches, snakes, pack their knapsacks, wake them up, feed them, brush their teeth and get them ready and out the door!

We made it to school right on time.

I am looking forward to hitting those sheets again tonight. I am surprised my menstrual flow is as strong as it is right now as usually it is much lighter and I wonder how this cleanse or purging my body is doing is affecting my cycle. I also wonder how I will feel when my period is on its way to finishing. The body aches and constipation I was experiencing last week and the headache and lethargy I am having today may all be directly related. Which could mean smooth sailing ahead….

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 13

What a day today! Today was the kids’ first day of school and it was a mad dash this morning to get everybody ready…all dressed up nice for the first day, snacks, lunches, knapsacks ready, etc. It all went very smoothly and my kids were very happy and excited. I was relieved as I had an event I had to go to last night that kept me out ’til about 9pm so I just missed my babes going to bed.

My BFF, Elizabeth, came with me last night to an event at the Tribeca Grand Hotel for Danny Kopel, one of our beloved Soul Cycle teachers. Danny, who is simply amazing btw and always makes my heart lighter and happier, was throwing a gathering in honor of his magazine Artwrit, their website (www.artwrit.com) and their new partnership with Huffington Post. It was a lovely event and I have to say there are not too many people or events that would get me out on a Wednesday night before the first day of school while I’m cleansing! Fortunately, Elizabeth happily agreed to join me AND she is on a cleanse and not drinking as well! It was fantastic to be at the chic Tribeca Grand and order Faux Cosmos together (yes, virgin!) and walk around with our pink cocktails in fancy glasses without any of the aftermath to worry about…so I thought!

Arul's 37-Day Cleanse: Day 13
Rockin’ out at Tribeca Grand with my faux Cosmo!
We were joking around about how strong “those drinks” were and funny enough, I woke up in the middle of the night with a really bad headache and was having trouble sleeping as though I had really consumed alcohol. Neither of us tasted any alcohol whatsoever and confirmed with the bartender that they were indeed non-alcoholic drinks so I am confident that’s not what it was. But I was definitely feeling off all morning.

After successfully dropping off my kids at school, I decided to come to SanaVita for my colonic. It occurred to me that although the drinks were alcohol free, they were filled with sugar and that may have been what was throwing me off. I didn’t have a lot of time though, so I quickly threw my pants off, tossed them on the counter and hopped on the table. Mid colonic, while on the phone with my dad and massaging my own belly to assist in the releases, I could swear I smelled smoke! I kept looking around but didn’t see anything and then finally I looked behind me and there on the countertop was a full-fledged bonfire! My pants were literally on fire! I jumped off the table mid colonic with water spraying everywhere basically naked rushing over to put this fire out. It was pretty intense. Fortunately there was no damage and I miraculously put it out with my breath and my hands without burning myself. My pants were literally ¾ gone, which was kinda sad. I had just bought them at Daffy’s and last night and this morning were the only times I ever got to wear them. Luckily, I had a pair of yoga shorts in my bag to walk out in. After I finished cleaning up the huge mess, I went over to Daffy’s to see about getting another pair of pants. FYI Daffy’s is going out of business!! They are having super sales on everything left in the store. Winter coats are 50% off the lowest marked price, so check it out!

Anyway, it was a crazy day after a fairly tame night out. The moral of the story? I’m not entirely sure what message the universe was trying to give me. Slow down? Stay present? Or, perhaps, sugar is as dangerous and can have just as big of an effect on us as alcohol.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 12

So this cleanse and these journal entries I’ve been writing have propelled me into doing something that I have been avoiding for years…learning how to create posts and navigate Facebook! People rarely believe me (unless you know me personally, then you get it!) that I never go on Facebook. But in my quest to cleanse and share my experience with as many people as possible, I am now posting my entries for everyone to see and I’m learning the lingo of this online community. And it is fascinating! I literally feel like I am back in French class again learning a whole new language! I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who has been reading my posts and sending me their messages of support! I love ya!!

Tomorrow public school starts and we have been getting everything ready for the big first day of school. My daughter is starting 1st grade and my son, kindergarten. Fortunately they seem very excited and my son keeps asking me, “Mama? In the nighttime, after, in the morning on the next day, will I be going to kindergarten?” “Yes Seven-pie! You will be starting kindergarten!” And then he smiles proudly and says “Ok, remind me to look handsome mama, ok?” Sooooo precious!

My daughter is rushing around collecting all her items that she will need and is organizing her desk, excitedly bringing me over to observe her new systems. I feel really lucky to have the opportunity to experience this rush of excitement and wonder of the beginning of the school year.

We forget what that is really like. I mean sure, we have our “markings” to designate the new seasons. We all know we’re not supposed to wear white pants after Labor Day (although I always enjoy getting in one more wear post Labor Day just to get a rise out of some folks!) but there isn’t that one particular defining moment that sets the new year propelling forward like that first day of school. Not even New Year’s Day.

Yes, we make our resolutions to improve ourselves in the new year, but truthfully most of America isn’t generally stepping up before January 2nd due to exhaustion or dehydration from staying up too late on New Year’s Eve or being too hung over! But the first day of school, ahhhhhh….it’s always fresh, it’s always mysterious. There are always energetic butterflies swarming and it is forever young, pure and innocent and full of optimistic possibilities.

So I am working double time today juggling between mama getting ready kids ready for school, business owner, student learning Facebook and cleanser documenting her experiences. Tonight I have an event to go to in support of one of my beloved spin teachers. I rarely go out on a school night, but this was an invite I simply couldn’t turn down. I just finished squeezing a basket full of oranges and will be using some of that fresh OJ for my creamsicle delight smoothie to give me the strength to keep on pushin’!

Creamsicle Delight Smoothie
2 cups fresh squeezed OJ
1 tablespoon chia seeds
1 tablespoon coconut oil
1 scoop vanilla Raw Sun Warrior protein powder
A couple of ice cubes
Blend!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 11

So today’s colonic really did the trick! A tremendous amount of dark and very hard matter came out and after my session today I finally felt much better. For the first time in days the body aches are gone!!

I also took a great yoga class today. I’ve been spinning a lot lately and missed my usual yoga class on Monday so I really needed it! Stretching the tight muscles out like that is sooo rejuvenating. I was sweating balls so I know I got a good workout too!

I topped off my self-care for the day with a long-awaited lymphatic drainage session with Bella. For those of you who are unfamiliar, the lymph system is responsible for processing excess fluids, toxins, foreign substances and cellular waste from all parts of the body. In order for the body to utilize its full elimination and rejuvenation potential, it is vital that lymph drainage pathways are clear for lymphatic tissues to carry toxins and waste to lymph nodes where they can then be purged.

Unlike the cardiovascular system, which has the heart to pump blood thru the veins, the lymphatic system has no catalyst to push the lymph thru the body for elimination. Lymphatic drainage therapy uses a device that not only runs on the same frequency as the lymphatic system, it omits three gases that assist in the breaking down and moving of lymph towards the nodes for proper elimination and to stabilize the hormones. The therapy is truly outstanding and powerful.

I was extremely sticky today during my session, which means that my lymph was pretty congested. I will need several more treatments and am committed to getting at least one per week for the next several weeks. Today’s treatment was incredibly relaxing and my body felt soooooo heavy during the session. I was drifting in and out of consciousness and felt deep healing taking place. Bella enhanced our session with the use of Young Living Essential Oils and raindrop therapy. Just what the non-doctor ordered!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 10

So yesterday after my colonic I still wasn’t feeling great but received an impromptu call from a friend asking me if I wanted to go to Electric Zoo with them. Electric Zoo, for those of you who don’t know, is an electric music festival on Randall’s Island. Simply put, it was slammin’! I almost passed because I was still suffering from body aches, but it’s a really special event that only happens once a year. And, Tiesto, one of my favorite new techno DJ’s was headlining so I popped 2 Tylenols, put on my leopard print cowboy hat and headed for the ferry!

The production that was put into place there was truly remarkable! There were a few tents with different DJs spinning all day, HUGE screens behind the DJs illuminated their faces and there were insane visuals nonstop. The main stage was even more grandiose, all the way down at the end of the field. Being outside on the grass, with trees all around and music playing from everywhere, thousands of people dancing and milling about — half of them in costumes — and decorations beautifying the space and seeing the city landscape in the background was absolutely exhilarating. I had fortified myself well before I left with juice and avocados so I was pretty sure I’d be ok. Fortunately, amongst the dozens upon dozens of food stands that were there, there existed one smoothie stand! Halfway through, when I was in need of a boost I enjoyed a fresh pineapple coconut smoothie and it was delish!!

Arul's 37-Day Cleanse_Day 10_Electric Zoo
Electric Zoo
Now I am going to share something with you now that I feel is really important. I also indulged in a drink with a small amount of alcohol in it. And this is not something that I encourage people to do while on a cleanse, but I want to be really honest with my readers about my journey. Being in that setting with so much stimulus and so many people around me, ummm, shall I say “stimulated” the desire to indulge in something refreshing was strong. So I made a choice to enjoy the moment, responsibly of course, and continue living, rather than hide myself away or feel frustrated and deprived. I had a drink with Sake and cranberry juice, lime, elderberry and water. It wasn’t strong, but it was refreshing and satisfied all the cravings I was having, including those to indulge in the delicious-looking vegetarian platters and teriyaki balls!

I had a great time! And was happy I went. Home by 9:30, sleeping by midnight. I still had some aching, but some of that now was due to sore muscles from all the dancing I did! I woke up today still feeling achy and decided to take the day off from any exercise whatsoever! I’ve been relaxing, working from home and making juices and smoothies. I’ve also decided to add some raw flax seed crackers into my repertoire to eat with my avocados. Again, I am being very conscious to chew thoroughly and follow up with digestive enzymes. I look forward to giving myself another colonic tomorrow and getting out more of this old stuff that’s been poisoning me!!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 9

So last night WAS interesting. About an hour and a half before my date I suddenly came down with fierce body aches all over my body. I headed straight to SanaVita to give myself a colonic. My stomach was tight and distended with gas and I had a very hard time releasing anything at all. It almost felt as though I had food poisoning but I hadn’t had anything other than the usual and so that just didn’t make any sense. I went on my date and by the time we met up, not only was I gripping my body in pain, I now had such intense chills my teeth were clattering! Now I am a blind date who isn’t eating, drinking and is shivering cold and sitting rigidly hugging myself barely able to carry on a conversation! Talk about first impressions!

I tried to explain what I was experiencing and fortunately my date was very laid back and understanding. We eventually got me some Tylenol (everything in moderation…in that level of distress I personally advocate medication within reason) and I started to feel human again.

What I realized was that trying to be out in the “regular world” while cleansing really wasn’t so hard! Fully disclosing what I’m doing and what I am experiencing made it a lot easier. And once I got over the initial hump of being in a bar and not having a drink it was smooth sailing. I had juice with me and drank it as needed. My outing was a success!

That whole night in bed and the next morning I was still in a lot of pain and still had the chills. So I got a colonic with Bella. When I explained what was happening to me, she decided to work very deeply on my stomach manually during my releases. At first nothing was moving, but after a lot of deep abdominal massage, finally stuff started to move. I wish I had taken some photos but I was in way too much discomfort to think of anything but breathing and releasing. In the end a LOT of very hard and dark matter started to rush thru the tube. In my opinion, something very old had been lodged inside my intestines started to loosen due to my cleansing. And the fermented poisons stuck inside of that debris had begun to permeate through the semi-permeable membrane of the intestines into my blood. The body aches and chills were a symptom of that poisoning. Although I did feel a LOT better after the colonic I still am not 100% and am still needing Tylenol to help with the body aches a couple of times a day.

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 8

So I have a date tonight. A date with someone I’ve never met. It’s interesting witnessing the disclosing over email that I am cleansing and won’t be eating or drinking. This particular guy happens to be a vegetarian and eco-conscious so my cleansing didn’t seem to throw him, but in a city this expansive with so many things to choose from, it still proves challenging to come up with some options that are comfortable for two strangers that don’t include eating or drinking! I think we are gonna shoot some pool or bowl and then go hear some live music.

Cleansing while dating can definitely be challenging. I’ve been thrown off many cleanses due to an impending date with someone new or a free weekend with my ex-beau, my time is so limited and when I have the chance to do grown-up single gal things, cleansing sometimes isn’t my first choice. But at this point I am in it to win it!

I had my biofeedback session with Gabriel Hoffman the other day. It was really wonderful to set the intentions for my cleanse with him. Gabriel and I have been working together for quite some time now and he is well aware of my sleeping issues. In the past, has put me on drops for many different things depending on what I was being challenged with or where I needed greater support. In this session with him, he took the time to test on the Scio each drop and supplement that I’ve been taking and determine via the feedback my central nervous system delivered back, whether it was appropriate for me to continue taking it.

Our pharmacy has really grown at SanaVita and I have the use of so many tools, but don’t always know exactly what I need and when I need it. And even though it may seem to make perfect sense to take certain things, it doesn’t necessarily mean it is what my body needs or is ready for. For example, the homeopathic Liver Cleanse. I am cleansing and thought that this would be the perfect time to enhance the detoxing of my liver by taking these drops. But my CNS said no; it’s not what I need right now.

By the end of extensive testing (that didn’t even take that long) of all the supplements and drops I had been using in the last several months, we narrowed it down to seven core components a day, which has really made things much simpler. It’s also reassuring that these seven items are what MY BODY needs RIGHT NOW. I’ve always had a difficult time with moderation. When I would cleanse I would tend to overdue it sometimes and either fry myself out and not be able to complete what I started or suffer too strong of a healing crisis that would knock me off my feet. The regimen Gabriel came up with for me is totally manageable. We plan on meeting weekly to check in and modify things as needed. I feel so fortunate to have this type of support during this journey!

I will support myself later with a colonic and drink a power smoothie before I go out tonight and bring some juices with me. This should be interesting!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 7

(Photo taken after a huge BM and at the end of a fruitful colonic. Don’t be fooled, there is still almost ALWAYS more to come!)

So this morning I woke up at 5:50 and was exhausted! My first thought was,
“Ohhh…sun is rising, wonder if my babies are gonna wake up soon or if I still have time to sleep.” My second thought was, “I went to bed at 10, it’s almost 6. Although I tossed and turned much throughout the night, that is still almost 8 straight hours of being somewhat asleep. Not bad.”

Yesterday, as I mentioned, I was really hungry. I probably should have had a colonic as the toxicity tends to make us crave food more, but I didn’t have the time. I had more smoothies than on other days and topped the evening off with 1 & ½ smashed up avocado with sea salt and lime juice. Smashed avocado isn’t quite as broken down as it is when it’s in a smoothie, so I make sure to swish it around my mouth a lot before swallowing (to get the enzymes going) and then chase it with a couple of digestive enzymes.

This morning, about 10 minutes after waking up, feeling heavy, tired and in need of more rest, I felt like I may have a bowel movement. Thinking it was most likely a false alarm as my digestive system has slowed down due to the cleanse, I was mapping out when I would have time for a colonic and then something amazing happened! Now this part is going to get slightly graphic so I warn you now. But come on, I am a Colon Hydrotherapist and owner of a center where we specialize in CHT so it would be unrealistic to think we weren’t gonna get to the nitty gritty at some point!

I had a perfect and massive BM (bowel movement), the kind you wanna write about and take a picture of! All the oils from the avocados and coconut shakes I had yesterday really lubricated my system and my body just opened up. I could feel the downward bearing sensation as this massively long and thick, soft but totally formed BM descended down and out of me as though it were in slow motion, and I could literally feel the heavy, lethargic, dismal feeling of not wanting to do anything leaving my body slowly as I released this massive mound. About 30 seconds later I was left feeling light, AWAKE and totally optimistic about the day and life in general. Remember yesterday when I talked about the body sensitizing and feeling the nutrients filling you with every sip of your juice? Well it’s the same sensation on the way out! Remarkable how different I can feel in literally 30 seconds.

And it got me thinking to how basic it all really is. Eating, pooing and sleeping. Those are the basic bare bone necessities in life. When a child is born, there are two primal concerns we have as parents: first, make sure the baby stays alive(!) and second, get some sleep! In order for these two things to happen, it is imperative that the child eats, digests, poos and gets some sleep so we can get some sleep. Your whole life becomes a mapping out of when the baby needs to eat, when it will be pooing and when we may all sleep again. I had charts counting and calculating the hours. I could plan exactly when my child would be pooing. If we were getting in the car, I knew when I had to feed my child to make sure we would be able to get out of the car in time for a change by the time she or he needed to poo. Fundamentals. Basic survival tactics.

So what happens to that? At some point we stop paying such close attention to our internal clocking system as we engage in other activities in life. Walking, talking, going to school, falling in love, earning a living. But perhaps if we went back to the fundamentals and paid a little more attention to what’s happening inside our bodies, our lives would be calmer, happier and more predictable in a positive way!

When my kids were potty training we would make a big fuss in the bathroom as many families do. But in our household it is truly a magical moment. I’ve always stayed with my kids while they would poo, often holding them to help them balance on the big potty and feel secure, noses touching, smelling one another’s breath and often whispering but talking about deep subjects. It became a sacred time that they would feel totally secure, sharing with me the thoughts that occupy their mind. Our special, private and very intimate time together in total confidence and filled with love. And after we always look at our creation, our “zucchini pie” as we like to secretly refer to it and I would declare excitedly, “now THAT is going to make you feel SOOOO MUCH BETTER!” And now my kids always make that declaration as they look at their zucchini pies in the potty and then look up at me and say “Mama? How come all the time you say dat is gonna make me feel sooo much betta?” And I say, “Well doesn’t it?” And they smile and nod their heads.

When I was in college I learned how to be bulimic and a long history of binging and purging surfaced. The end result was a shot digestive system with little to no peristaltic action (the contractions that help to move matter through the digestive system) and about 1 BM a week if I was lucky. It was a very dark time in my life. After suffering with depression in high school and trying to move past it, I found myself constantly depressed even though I was out of the house and finally had some freedom that I was longing for. Why was I still so depressed? It made me hate myself even more. I felt dark inside and like I wanted to isolate myself from others, literally feeling unworthy of love or being physically near people. This lasted for years. I tried many methods of therapy and even anti-depressants and other mood stabilizers but still I struggled. Then I found cleansing. I learned how to juice cleanse and THEN I discovered colonics. I went for colonics for 3 years on a weekly basis while retraining the muscle of my colon to work again. It changed my life forever. (Read more about my personal journey.) And I realized that so much of the darkness, the self-loathing, the sadness was really just poo. The poo was poisoning me from the inside out. I was trying to medicate myself from every which way other than actually addressing the problem. My body wasn’t’ working properly and when I was filled with shit, I felt like shit and had shitty thoughts. When I would clear that out I felt clear, and life was filled with possibilities.

I love the discoveries I have made and the work that I do and the possibility of helping others to discover the power they own to change their own lives dramatically and forever. Now I’m not saying there aren’t other real problems out there that might depress us or that their aren’t people with real chemical imbalances that may improve with western medicine. But I AM saying that there is the GREAT possibility that if you change the internal environment, you very well may see (and here’s where I bet my money every time I have the courage to do so) a direct correlated shift in your external environment. I know I do. EVERY time!! And this can be a frightening concept for a lot of people, might even piss you off because what it means is that we are more accountable for our own lives than we may care to give ourselves credit for. Once you take on that accountability, it is very hard to ever close your eyes to it again. You can, and you probably will, but you’ll know that you are doing it and eventually you will need to face yourself again. When you are ready.

Our potentials are tremendous. When I look at my own life, although I have a grand old time getting on my self-deprecating, “Let’s beat up Arul and think of all the ways she’s not living up to her potential” egomania train, when I shut that tape off and look at my accomplishments I am not only amazed, but I am truly proud of myself! And why not? I had no idea that I would be a single mother of two young children and running a business on my own (well, I do have the support of a truly talented and skilled staff who are all enlightened loving souls!) while still not throwing myself under the bus and carving out the time to take care of myself.

Over the years, I’ve struggled with putting others’ needs in front of my own. And I feel good about what I have done and what I am doing. And every time it starts with what I put in my mouth and how much I am able to let it go. And when I say, let it go, I mean all of it. Not JUST the poo, but the emotional and mental ties we have to holding onto our pain. I take spin class at Soul Cycle, which I LOVE and recommend highly. One of my beloved teachers, Marvin, always reminds us to “let it go.” This mantra has permeated my brain waves and my soul and constantly I am reminded to let it go. Just let it go. All of it. The poo, the negative thoughts, the ideas that we can’t do something or that we can’t let something go…we can. It’s just a training, a discipline, like everything else.

P.S. My yeast infection is totally gone!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.Read Arul’s next post.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 6

So far the day has been pretty uneventful. I am tired today. Slept well till about 4am and then was up and down till 6am. My energy is low, but I had such a busy couple of days I suppose that is to be expected. And I am hungry today. I’ve been drinking a small juice or smoothie every 2 hours. Blue Print Cleanse green juices are really so delicious, I’ve been having one of those on most days and now that they are all organic, I swear I can taste the difference. When the body has less in it and gets used to not ever being full, it sensitizes and becomes very aware of what does go inside. As I drink the BPC green juice I can feel and visualize the juice cascading down into my belly and filling me up. The dense nutrients rippling out like skipping a stone into the water, sending health and vitality and love to every cell in my body.

I swear I can feel it!

I was zipping around in the city today on my bike, Thumbalina. I have had her for over a decade now and ride her like a race horse. She’s been good to me, gets me to my meetings or to SanaVita with a few minutes to spare, brings me back home to my babes at the end of the day safe and sound.

I am having my Biofeedback session with Gabriel today at SanaVita. I am really looking forward to that, modifying the drops I am taking and seeing what else my body is in need of during this transformative cleanse.

I am going to make one of my favorite smoothies later. It is Arul’s Green Machine.

Check it out:
Soak 3 tablespoons of chia seeds in coconut water for 20 minutes
Pour into blender and add more coconut water to about the 32 oz. mark
Add 3 LARGE handfuls of spinach
1 hefty dollop of coconut oil
1 avocado
1 tablespoon or 2 of flax meal
Add more coconut water on top to cover everything you’ve already put in
Add a couple of ice cubes and blend
2 servings should last about 2 days (no more than that though)

This smoothie is jam packed with high-energy nutrients, proteins and healthy fats. Don’t worry about healthy fats, the mind may play those old tapes that fat equals fat, but it isn’t true. When you keep your sugar intake down and eat whole healthy foods — as long as you are not over eating and you are digesting — you should not gain weight from the fats. In fact, you will most likely drop extra weight if you eat in that manner. I eat TONS of healthy fats and I can finally say with confidence (after many, many years of self image and eating disorders) I am NOT fat!!

P.S. A little trivia about chia seeds… they used to be called “the runners food” because Native Americans would take chia seeds with them on their hunting expeditions as they were very light and easy to carry, jam packed with protein and are a very high source of calcium! And yes, they are what cha cha cha chia, cha cha cha chia pets are grown from!

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 5

Soooooo…what I’ve discovered is that cleansing is a lot like birthing. You need a plan! You need to know what it is you want, how you visualize it going down, map out the steps…and then, you need to be able to roll with the punches and do what it takes to continue the mission safely and soundly.

So if you read my entry yesterday I had great plans for self care! Colonic, Lymphatic Drainage Therapy, Yoga and a Massage were all on my horizon! Which I really needed because when I woke up yesterday I was feeling tired, very much in need of a colonic and was savagely broken out, not to mention I had a very unpleasant yeast infection, something I haven’t gotten in quite some time. So I was ready to support my detox just after taking my daughter, Naturale to get her school supplies. I left my son Seven home with Allyson our nanny, happy as a clam to be back home playing with his things. When we returned Seven was burning with fever, 103.5 and scared he was going to vomit. Soon after I noticed a small bug in his ear! The third one I had seen that morning. All of a sudden it came crashing down!! “Seven pie is sick as a dog and has lice!!” Naturale had it too. And now our house — and everyone in it — were most likely infected as well!

So change of plans! We spent the day in a way that only parents who have kids with lice can imagine. EVERYTHING needed to be cleaned, washed, heat dried, vacuumed and / or bagged!! Linens, stuffed animals, combs, car seats, coats, clothes, couches, rugs. And on it went! We needed to get ourselves deloused ASAP!! My poor Seven pie was lying on the floor with the one pillow we left out of the wash burning with fever asking to please lie in a bed while I was on the phone trying desperately to get an appointment that day for the 3 of us. You wouldn’t believe the killing these companies make during the summer…“lice season!” We were there for three hours!! Each child was shampooed, combed and “nit picked” for three hours straight while I tried to keep them as comfortable as possible. Fortunately, today they use all natural products but still, it is an ordeal! When we finally arrived home, Seven was still burning up and I still needed to delouse myself, even though they checked me at the lice center and said they saw nothing. I had been in such close proximity to my babes, the likelihood was that some critter had transferred.

Lice
Some of the bugs & eggs from my daughter’s delousing.
My dear friend Sylvia, who had just gone through this with her family, offered to come over to help. She spent about two hours meticulously combing through my hair section by section. We found one bug and three eggs! I finally laid down to rest a little after midnight and have to say, since this cleanse has started had the best night’s sleep I’ve gotten thus far! Yeast, pimples, shit stuck in my colon and lice finally put me over the tipping point to getting a real night’s rest!!

When I woke up this morning my skin was miraculously shinning, glowing and blemish free! My yeast infection (which I am treating with tea tree oil suppositories and probiotics) felt negligible in just one night and I finally didn’t feel itchy all over! I did still feel bloated in my belly and went to SanaVita for a colonic. Now I am feeling golden!

Today has been a great day, not to mention how amazingly beautiful it is outside. I feel renewed!! I started the day with a bang when Naturale strolled into my room at 6am shouting “GOOD MORNING” cheerfully, something I actually taught her, but didn’t mean for her to do at that hour! After getting to bed late and still waking up from some disturbing dreams during the night, I was pretty darn exhausted! But I took a spin class today and my two-hour pole dance class and was told by my teacher and fellow students that it was the best dance I’ve done thus far! And it was the first time I completed a dance in its entirety without ever getting nervous or my body trembling by the end.

I went and enjoyed a super food smoothie at Liquiteria and sat outside thinking about how different things can be day to day. Yesterday was insanity. Today was empowering and calm.

My kids are walking in the door and our shampooing, combing hair extravaganza is about to begin!

Stay tuned…

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 4

So yesterday went pretty well. Had a busy day preparing for my kids’ return with lots of nervous energy. Had a lot of anxiety dreams about their return…dreams involving looking for each other, getting separated, not being able to see them even though I could hear them…then in the morning I discovered that my daughter had been up all night vomiting. A lot of purging seeming to be going on for us and clearly the connection was intact. So, needless to say, it was an intense day, highly charged with electric energy.

I did manage to take yoga in the afternoon. It was a pretty challenging class, holding poses longer, draining the muscles more fully. I felt much more centered after that. Had a homemade fresh-squeezed OJ in the morning with a tablespoon of flax seed oil. Then, in the afternoon I made a large power smoothie. I used homemade nut milk as the liquid (see recipe below) and added a banana, frozen organic blueberries and raspberries, two tablespoons of raw organic almond butter for protein, maca, kamu, tacos vitamin E, cacao butter and spirulina. I drank that throughout the afternoon and followed it up in the evening with some raw organic coconut water.

My reunion with my kiddies was fantastic…absolutely perfect! They looked wonderful and the three of us were beaming with delight and ecstatic love to be together again. We had a sweet and very happy evening together playing Twister, reading The Lion King and sharing some stories. We had a nice toast with our new mugs: “Mr. Messy”, “Miss Princess” and “Miss Naughty”. We clinked our mugs filled with coconut water and stared into each others eyes and we toasted to the divine beings behind those eyes.

I’m already starting to feel a shift inside myself in just three days, giving my body the essentials it needs and no more than that. But what I am giving it is pure and concentrated wholesome goodness. I can feel it starting to take effect on my aura or “energy” if you will.

I am still struggling with my sleep, but staying hopeful. My skin is very broken out — patches of small pimples on my forehead and my temples. My throat feels slightly scratchy today and my nose slightly stuffed. I have not had a Colonic since Sunday so I will treat myself to one today as I am sure that will make me feel much better. I am moving my bowels a little as I am having solids (although liquefied) in the Vita Mix, but still not enough to remove the toxins my body is releasing adequately.

In addition to the Colonic, I am going to have a Lymphatic Drainage session today. That should help the congestion I am feeling in my head and get my lymph moving in general as the lymph gets thick and stagnant.

At the end of the week, I am going to have a Biofeedback session with Gabriel Hoffman and focus in more deeply on my intentions, my progress on the cleanse and tweak my supplements accordingly with the guidance of both Gabe and Scio Biofeedback.

For those of you interested in nut milk making here’s how I do it:

Nut Milk

You can use any of your favorite nuts, and experiment with them. I typically use almonds.

Soak 1 cup of almonds in a Tupperware with a cover in clean water for 12 hours.

Rinse them (pour out the old water) and place the nuts in a blender and fill blender with clean water to about 40 oz.

Add 1 large dollop of coconut oil.

Add a dash of vanilla & cinnamon and Agave Nectar or Yucon Syrup (lower glycemic index) to taste & blend.

Place the nut milk bag in a large container and pour entire contents into the nut milk bag (you may have to do this in 2 shots if the container is too full.

Squeeze the nut milk bag with your hand to get all the milk out then discard the bits left in the bag.

Your nut milk is ready!

(lasts about 2 days)

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.

Arul’s 37-Day Cleanse: Day 3

Last month my daughter turned six. I started reflecting on the last seven years of my 41-year journey. So much has happened since the conception of my first child, seven years ago this October. I took a good long look at myself and while I see my many outstanding achievements — three of which are my children (my two babies and SanaVita) — I also see the toll the intensity of these last seven years has taken on my body.

The biggest debt that I’ve had to pay over these last seven years has become dependency. Dependency on caffeine, to get me through the morning. Dependency on caffeine, to get me through the evening. Dependency on sleep aids to get me through the night, leading to more dependency on more caffeine in the morning. Dependency on a glass of wine or two to take the edge off at the end of a hard day. Further disrupting my sleep, creating a greater need for more sleep aids. It has become an exhausting roller coaster that has affected the quality of my life.

Before childbearing, I never suffered from sleep issues. As anyone has been through it knows, sleep deprivation is torturous and although some babies come into the world and sleep soundly off the bat, it’s probably the minority that are that blessed.

So I’ve decided to embark on a 37-day cleanse. In an effort to learn to sleep again, my intention is to use these 37 days to be completely stimulant free and retrain my body to get back into its natural rhythms of sleeping. You may wonder, why 37 days? I originally mapped out a 40-day cleanse in which I started and stopped and re-started several times over the course of three weeks and then settled into it this past Saturday, realizing that 37 was my magic number. We LOVE the auspicious number seven of perfection in our family. I am in the start of my third day now and am finally feeling the momentum…

I started planning for this cleanse months ago when I gave up caffeine on the spot. Again, I was never a coffee drinker before childbearing, but sleepless nights led to double espressos in the morning, every morning, and sometimes a booster shot in the afternoon. I stopped cold turkey and faced my headaches from withdrawal (I suffer from migraines and it wasn’t pretty). I’ve been completely caffeine free (with the exception of some high- quality dark chocolate) for about two months now.

And now I am off the sleep aids as well, leaning on natural melatonin drops, valerian root drops and Relax Tone. I have also upped my iron and started a regimen of two doses a day of high-quality iron supplements, as I’ve always been somewhat anemic. Insomnia and migraines happen to be side effects of a low red blood cell count. These first few nights have been rough but each night I’ve slept a little deeper, a little longer and feel optimistic that by the end of these 37 days I will be able to lie down and get a solid night’s rest. Without the sleep aids I’ve been getting between four to five hours of sleep a night, which are broken up into one to two hour segments. I’ll keep you posted on my progress!

So what exactly am I cleansing on? Being the hardcore girl I’ve always been, I thought I’d do just juice! But after starting and stopping several times I had to reevaluate my priorities. If I had the time and space to carve out to just cleanse and not do much of anything else it would be one thing, but it doesn’t work for me at this point in my life. I have to admit that was a pretty big blow to my ego. My ego threw a three-week-long open house party to every negative thought and self-deprecating argument I could pour upon myself…all the tapes playing at once, “you’re such a loser, you’re weak, you’re a failure.” But it’s not true. I just needed to see what was real and adjust accordingly.

So I am cleansing on fresh juices and super food smoothies, many of which I make myself. I will be sharing some of my favorite recipes with you during these 37 days. I am also on a specific supplemental regime that I, along with the help of Gabriel Hoffman, SanaVita’s Pharmacy Director, have put together and will modify accordingly.

I have chosen to continue with my exercise regimen during the cleanse. I will modify during class as I need to, but just to fill you in on what I do physically in a day other than the basics of getting around, taking care of my children (who are six and almost five), preparing them for school, and working, I take a two-hour pole dance class once or twice a week, spin class three to four times a week and yoga two to three times a week. Finally I ride my bike all over the city for transportation and take long bike rides for fun! This weekend Gabriel and I rode our bikes over the Williamsburg Bridge, through Brooklyn and back home over the Manhattan Bridge. Fun stuff!!

I am really excited for this as I’ve been yearning for a deep transformative cleanse for a long time now. These last seven years have been a wild ride. I’d like to share some of the highlights…

In seven years, I have:

  • Carried two babies to full term and gave birth to them naturally
  • Moved three times
  • Opened three businesses
  • Closed two businesses
  • Got married
  • Got divorced
  • Fell deeply in love (post-divorce), had my heart shattered…and survived
  • Watched, witnessed and participated in the developmental milestones of my children…crawling, walking, talking, writing, reading. We now have deep meaningful philosophical conversations. They have been away with their father for three weeks and return home today. I cannot wait!

I’m really excited for this 37-day cleanse as I’ve been yearning for a deep transformative cleanse for a long time now. I look forward to sharing my journey with you. I will write as much as I am able to and will include things I notice about myself, my energy, my moods, my sleep, the supplements I’m taking and the effects I feel. And, I’ll also post recipes and photos.

If anyone has any questions, thoughts, insights, please feel free to contact me at anytime!

With LOVE!
Arul

Arul Goldman is the Founder and Director of SanaVita.